Before long we may have to name the GOP 2016 presidential primary “The 300.” Who is not running or planning to run for president is the real question.
On Monday, Carly “Demon Sheep” Fiorina entered the race, promising to do to America what she did to Hewlett Packard as its CEO (hint: the board of directors had to fire her for nearly destroying the company). Carly Fiorina Announces 2016 Presidential Bid. I already told you about her shtick. Carly ‘demon sheep’ Fiorina is baaaaack!
Also on Monday, Dr. Ben Carson, the right’s “our Black guy!,” announced that he is running for president to a gospel choir doing a cover of Eminem’s Lose Yourself. No, I am not kidding. The 9 best moments from Ben Carson’s bizarre and glorious campaign launch/concert. For someone who was a brilliant neurosurgeon, this guy has some truly nutty ideas. 7 Ridiculous Things Ben Carson Believes.
Today, former Arkansas governor, FAUX News host, and huckster for a quackery ‘diabetes solution kit’ and Christian Reconstructionist history cartoons for kids, Mike Huckabee will teach your children history, will announce his second run for president. This guy is the real life Elmer Gantry – “it’s Huckajesus!” Joining Race, Huckabee Has Rivals for Evangelical Vote.
I don’t know what “Huckajesus” can do to top Ben Carson’s gospel choir from yesterday. Maybe he will invite his good buddy, racist and misogynist Ted Nugent, to play guitar with him again. [UPDATE: Nope. Tony Orlando sans Dawn performed a song he wrote for Huckabee, called “America is my hometown.” That’s just sad.]
h/t DonkeyHotey graphics