Brewer: Embarrassment, liability or tourist attraction?

by David Safier

The Accidental Guv is clearly an embarrassment. Her debate performance . . . let's just say, her 16 seconds of silence may replace the 18 minute gap on Nixon's White House tapes in the history books.

And it looks like she's a liability as well. Her Republican political game show, Fear Factor, is scaring tourists and businesses away in droves. And now Brewer's nationally covered debate meltdown has the whole nation asking itself, "What kind of state would have a governor like that, and seriously consider voting for her?"

But I'm thinking, maybe we can turn her national celebrity into a tourist draw. She could hold meet-and-greets with people at the Grand Canyon, say. Imagine Brewer standing there surrounded by hundreds of excited travelers. She giggles and grimmaces while the crowd chants, "One! Two! Three! . . ." all the way up to 16. To add to the excitement, she could exclaim, "Today I'm going for twenty!" Imagine the cheers. Think of iPhone videos zipping their way back to the folks at home.

I'll bet Brewer's handlers could find a costume store where they could buy a severed head with fake blood dripping from its neck. She could hold the head up and proclaim, "This [ominous pause] is the actual head of an illegal immigrant found right here in the Grand Canyon. Follow me as we search for more headless bodies and maybe [pause] another severed head." For educational value, a ranger could tag along and point out some of the geological marvels of the canyon while Brewer leads them to a few strategically hidden heads and bodies. What fun!

Events could be scheduled all over the state. National TV would eat it up. Crowds would flock to the state for a Brewer sighting.

The only drawback I can see is, if Brewer wins in November, her official duties would take time away from her tourist-attracting schedule. Why hide her away on the ninth floor when she should be out greeting the public? Hey, I've got an idea . . .