Some hopeful gems from Pearce’s money pitch

by David Safier

A friend just forwarded me a Pearce pitch for money (Yes, friends let friends read Pearce's campaign screeds).

I love a few lines. For instance:

So, now I’m running in a district against another Republican, but where everyone can vote: Republicans, Democrats, Independents, everyone. They know they have to get just a sliver of the Republican vote from me and I’ll be removed from office.

Just a sliver of the Republican vote and you're out? Yes! Preach, Russell, Preach!

Then there's this:

If these radical groups are successful in removing me from office, they’ll use this campaign as a model across the country to remove even more conservatives from office.

Radical groups? Um, Russell, you're on the wingnut fringe of right wing radicals, guy. But the idea that ousting Pearce will give others the energy boost they need to get rid of his like? You just can't beat that kind of prediction.

Here, by the way, is his reticent, pious, I-hate-to-ask-you-for-money pitch:

I hate asking for contributions, but I've been around elections long enough to have learned this simple truth: if I do not ask you for money, this group of left-wing extremists will successfully engineer the taking of my Senate seat this November. I have to rely on the contributions and prayers of thousands of likeminded Americans like you, in the hope that you care enough about the values we share to contribute to the effort.

Oh, and if you don't want to contribute online, you can mail your dough to "Patriots for Pearce." Really. That's what it says.