Damn! You’re still here?

Posted by AzBlueMeanie:

To paraphrase, it's always 6 P.M. somewhere in the world. And no, there's no sign of the Earth-rendering earthquakes of the Apocalypse.

You don"t have to go to Heaven, but you can't stay here.

By setting the date for the End Times, Oakland, California's own Harold Camping, the owner of Family Stations, Inc. has achieved more than even he might have imagined. Headlines, hits on Google and Bing, face time on television; not bad for a guy rapidly approaching 90 years on the planet. Harold Camping's Days Are Numbered: A Quick and Dirty Guide to The Rapture:

After 6 P.M. [today] he will go down in history as the P.T. Barnum of End Times Prophesy. Unlike Barnum, however, Camping's organization has amassed anywhere from $75 to 125 million in assets, depending on who is doing the counting.

And until 6 P.M. Saturday, May 21st, Camping is swallowing up all the oxygen in Armageddon-ville.

It's anybody's guess as to what Camping will say after his predicted End Times time comes and goes and we're all still here. It's anybody's guess what his followers will say after Camping's second go-round at Rapture predicting falls through.

* * *

There is no guessing game about Camping from other Armageddonists: they, almost universally, believe he has sullied the whole End Times industry.

Tim LaHaye, The King of the Apocalyp$e Returns, Enjoying the Rapture all the Way to the Bank with an End of Times Four Pack while waiting for the End Times. Tyndall House Publishers has repackaged Tim LaHaye's 'Left Behind' series of best-selling apocalyptic novels. And LaHaye himself is pressing forward with plans for 'The Resurrection' a movie depicting 'ten post-resurrection appearances of Christ.'

The world's second oldest profession are the clowns of God prophesying the end of the world — while picking the rubes' pockets and living the good life.

The History (sic) Channel is now free to continue running its Nostradamus/Mayan Calendar/Armageddon day once a week — at least until December 21, 2012 – to promote the sale of these End Times industry products. Yes, it really is that crass.

So your day is not a total loss, here is R.E.M. in concert singing their hit song "It's the end of the world as we know it (and I feel fine)."