Friends don’t let friends drive Republican

Posted by AzBlueMeanie:

It was good to see President Obama pick up a meme I have used in the past to explain the economy in a story people can understand.

George W. Bush was the drunken frat boy with the keys to the car and his Uncle Sam's credit card. All his Republican fraternity brothers in Congress piled into the backseat of the car and let their drunken fraternity brother drive the car because, after all, he had the keys.

They all decided to paint the town red using George's Uncle Sam's credit card to turn the government into an ATM cash machine for their rich friends and themselves with two massive tax cuts.

George managed to get his nose bloodied in a bar fight at the 9-11 Club and so he went all Texas cowboy starting two wars to prove to the world just how tough he was. His friends wildly cheered him on. Of course, George paid for his two wars with his Uncle Sam's credit card. It isn't polite to ask your fraternity brothers to pay.

After a long night of carousing and drinking and fighting, George and his buddies decided to call it a night and head home. But on the way home, George drove the car off the road and into a deep ditch. George managed to free himself from the wreck and to crawl up the embankment to the road, and he ran away. "Hey! Where the hell is he going?" his fraternity brothers all seemed to ask in unison.

The car was hopelessly stuck in muck, and the shaken-up drunken frat boys didn't know what else to do so one used his cell phone to call Triple-A for a tow truck to get them out of the ditch. The tow truck from Democratic Tow Service showed up and the driver, Barack Obama, got out to assess the situation. "Looks like you boys really messed up," he said. "Why don't you boys help me get this wreck out of the ditch and back on the road?"

The drunken frat boys all sheepishly shook their heads yes. Obama set about hooking up the wreck to the winch on his tow truck and prepared to winch the vehicle out of the muck. "When I start up the winch, you boys help push this wreck out of the muck to free it up," said Obama.

Obama started up the winch, but instead of helping to push the wreck out of the muck to free it up, the drunken frat boys all sat down on the ground and did nothing. "Hey! How about you boys pushing that wreck out of the muck? You drove this car into the ditch, the least you boys can do is help to get it out."

"We weren't driving, George was!," the drunken frat boys all seemed to say in unison. "You're the tow truck driver, you get this wreck out of the ditch!" Obama shook his head at the hopeless irresponsibility of the drunken frat boys, and set about winching the vehicle out of the muck in the ditch.

Some of the drunken frat boys sitting on their asses thought it might be fun to amuse themselves by tossing stones at the tow truck driver while he struggled to extricate the wreck from the muck in the ditch without their help. "Hey! What the hell is wrong with you boys?" said Obama. "Is that any way to treat someone who is helping you to get your car out of the ditch?" Some of the frat boys laughed and hurled invectives and insults at the tow truck driver.

The winch finally worked the wreck free from the muck in the ditch, and the tow truck driver gradually winched the vehicle up the steep embankment and back onto the road. "Which one of you miscreants is going to pay for this tow service?" asked Obama sternly. "Not me!" the drunken frat boys all seemed to shout in unison. "George is paying for everything with his Uncle Sam's credit card."

"Which one of you boys is George?" asked Obama. "He left. He took off running down the road about an hour ago," said one frat boy with a sickly orange face. "Just give us the keys to the car and we will be on our way. I'm sure George's Uncle Sam will pay for your tow service."

The tow truck driver had heard enough and responded indignantly, "You boys were so reckless and irresponsible that you actually let your friend drive drunk and he drove you all into the ditch. You damn fools are lucky you weren't all killed! Then you sat on your drunken asses and did nothing to help me pull this car out of the ditch while insulting me. Didn't your mamas teach you all better manners than that? Do you really think I am just going to give you boys the keys and let you stiff me for my tow service? Hell no you won't!"

Obama climbed into the cab of his tow truck. "I guess you boys better start walking back to town, it might even sober you up" said Obama. With the wreck secured to the tow truck, Obama drove away, leaving the drunken frat boys standing by the side of the road.