Let’s take a look at the voter suppression and burdensome bills making their way through the Arizona legislature. Here are the deets, along with a few barbs and bulleted sound bites. No, I didn’t do Debate Club in school, so don’t expect any balanced arguments in favor of these loony laws. But give it a read anyway, okay?
HB2304 – Voting Locations, Precinct Based
Republicans want to shutter those “pesky” county-wide voting centers and return to precinct-based voting, because democracy is nothing, if not made inconvenient. Funny thing, though. Republicans lose “bigly” when voting is easily accessible because turn out increases. Aww, poor babies. They even admitted this publicly, so let’s hear it for transparency, even when it’s unintentional and not consistently applied.
Why This Bill Stinks
- Reduced accessibility
- Longer lines and increased wait times
- Increased voter confusion
- Overstretched security resources
- Lack of modern technology
- Reduced early voting opportunities
- Disproportionate impact on communities
- Increased costs
HB2307 – Hand Counting; Machines; Prohibition
And while they’re at it, Arizona Republicans also want to shitcan ballot tabulation machines and require laborious hand counting, even if it takes forever to declare the winners. Luddites don’t understand technology anyway, so this is no real surprise.
You know what this reminds me of? That time Louis DeJoy, our United States Postmaster General, decided to rip out a bunch of mail-sorting machines for whatever reason. Yeah, Republicans are not into cost-savings or efficiency when it benefits them more to be oppositional.
The not-so-good news? Overeager candidates can and will prematurely declare victory any time during the slow-as-molasses ballot count and really confuse matters. But that’s not actually a deliberate “feature” of this bill. Human nature being what it is, are you comfortable with going back to hand counting? Yeah, no.
Why This Bill Stinks
- Increased potential for human error
- Slower reporting of results
- Physical strain on election workers
- Need for larger workforce
- Political pressure to prematurely report
- Lack of transparency
- Increased chance of manipulation or misconduct
- Increased costs
HB2305 – Ballots; Signature Verification
Come on! This is just overkill, but Republicans can’t govern so they spend their time fiddling with done-and-dusted stuff. Why, you ask? Because maybe they’ll get to sneak in a little plot twist and we won’t notice. Look, Arizona already allows observers at all stages. And it doesn’t really matter who observes anyway because Republicans repeatedly experience the Mandela Effect, causing everyone else to sigh, “Seriously?”
Why This Bill Stinks
- Lack of representation for independent voters
- Inadequate time for Democratic prep to debate
- Disingenuous stated purpose of “clarifying existing law”
- Increased potential for election interference or manipulation
HB2233 – Election Contests; Procedures
This is a sore loser, election-denier bill that allows disgruntled candidates to further abuse the Arizona court system with more frivolous claims of election fraud. Good grief, y’all! Whose boneheaded idea was this anyway? Kari Lake’s? The bill also allows whiners to leapfrog the Appeals Court and go straight to the Arizona Supreme Court, kind of like the golden buzzer on America’s Got Talent.
Why This Bill Stinks
- Increased likelihood of voter intimidation
- Increased election challenges
- Increased likelihood of evidence-free lawsuits
- Risk of ballot damage from excessive handling
- Further enables election denialism
- Undermines voter confidence
- Undermines democracy
Okay, that’s it for now. So “Talk amongst yourselves.” – Mike Myers in SNL’s “Coffee Talk.”
AZGOP, the party of Kafka! Insisting that all ballots be hand counted and them shrieking that the count is taking too long!
From the Fassbinder 1982 cyberpunk thriller Kamikaze 1989 (I’m paraphrasing from memory here): First we create conditions where people have nothing to do but drink and then we beat the sh*t out of them for it! Contemporary GOP policy these days.