Arizona Slowpokes Could Pay More Than Speeders

Ah, Arizona’s legislature—where the solution to every minor inconvenience is a brand-new law, preferably one that already exists. This time, the scourge of society isn’t foreign entities stealing our state’s ground water, contradictory border security narratives, or Republicans’ love affair with school vouchers for the wealthy. No, the real crisis—the one that demands immediate legislative action—is slow drivers in the left lane.

Enter HB 2235, brought to you by Rep. Teresa Martinez (R-Casa Grande), who is just so tired of left-lane loiterers that she wants to make it a $500 offense.

If It Annoys Me, It’s a Crisis

Now, don’t get me wrong—riding behind a traffic tortoise is annoying. But let’s appreciate how this bill came about. You see, HB 2235 follows a classic formula:

  • Lawmaker has a mildly irritating personal experience.
  • Lawmaker declares it’s a massive, systemic problem.
  • Lawmaker proposes duplicating an existing law, but with bigger consequences.
  • State law enforcement has bigger fish to fry.
  • No actual enforcement of the new law happens.
  • Wash, rinse, repeat.

Martinez is simply carrying on centuries of legislative tradition, as in ‘the situation never bothered me until I experienced it firsthand.’ And so, because Rep. Martinez had one too many frustrating drives on I-10, you could now be fined more for driving legally in the wrong lane than for running a red light.

Martinez claims she’s never seen Department of Public Safety troopers pull anyone over on the stretch of Interstate 10 south of Chandler, according to a recent article on Tucson.com. Of course, her personal 24/7 highway surveillance makes her the ultimate authority on traffic enforcement.

But the part of her bill she is seriously stoked about is bigger signs. Yeah, the problem isn’t a gap in driver education, lack of PSAs on local airwaves, missing messages via the ADOT’s programmable highway signs, or even lack of enforcement. No, no. It’s that the signs aren’t big enough! Clearly, the reason people are camping in the left lane isn’t because they’re bad drivers. It’s because they haven’t seen a 4-by-6-foot billboard screaming “LEFT LANE FOR PASSING ONLY.”

Clone the Law That No One Enforces

But we already have a law for this (Arizona Revised Statutes § 28-721). Arizona drivers are already required to keep right unless passing. And since that doesn’t work? Well, the state will hit you with a fine so ridiculous you’d think you committed grand theft auto, not the crime of driving exactly the speed limit in the wrong lane.

But, wait. It gets better. Lawmakers have tried and failed before to crack down on left-lane slowpokes. In February 2024, Senate Bill 1681 stalled out, despite proposing a $250 fine for dawdling drivers.

Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.

More Expensive Than Real Danger

Let’s compare this $500 fine—which, thanks to our love of hidden surcharges, will cost a hell of a lot more—with what you’d pay for actual, dangerous driving violations:

  • Running a red light? In Arizona, fines for running a red light vary. Generally, the base fine for a red light violation is around $250. So, nearly T-boning someone is less offensive than delaying Rep. Martinez’s ETA by 30 seconds.
  • Speeding 30 mph over the limit? In Chandler, you’d have to drive at least 30 mph over for your fine to be about $385. And we’re talking, at that extra speed, of the potential for life-changing injuries. But, HB2235 says you’d pay more for driving like a tour guide than if you turned Interstate 10 into the Indy 500.
  • No car seat for your kid? Meh, not a big deal, apparently. That’s right. Some folks think a slow driver is many times more offensive than failing to properly secure a baby in a moving vehicle. But hey, once you’ve been brought to term, the GOP’s job is done. Buckle up—or don’t. Nobody cares.

Fines: The Solution That Requires No Thought or Effort

Look, if we really wanted to fix the problem of slow drivers, we could:

  • Teach people how to drive properly: Make lane discipline a bigger part of driver’s ed and the license renewal process.
  • Actually enforce existing laws: Before we slap a new, ridiculous fine on people, how about we make sure law enforcement actually enforces the law that’s already there?
  • Use technology: Arizona can use cameras to issue tickets for expired tags but somehow can’t manage digital road signs reminding people to move over?

But all of that requires actual thought and effort. So instead, lawmakers are doing what they always do: make a new law and call it a day.

Arizona Politics: Where Common Sense Takes the Slow Lane

Arizona’s roads do have real issues—congestion, aggressive driving, and the occasional tumbling tumbleweed—but left-lane slowpokes, while annoying, are not exactly the biggest crisis we face. And yet, here we are, adding another fine to the pile, doubling down on a law that already exists, and hoping Arizona Highway Patrol—or whatever we casually call them these days—magically starts to care about something they’ve ignored for years.

But hey, at least we’ll have some fancy new signs. And when this bill inevitably does nothing, I look forward to the next legislative brainstorm session where they propose raising the fine to $1,000 and making offenders write “I will not be a left-lane menace” 500 times on a chalkboard.

Because in Arizona politics, common sense is always stuck in the slow lane.


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2 thoughts on “Arizona Slowpokes Could Pay More Than Speeders”

  1. When I was in college, back and forth on I-10, Tempe to Tucson, everyone said I-10 will be great with three lanes soon. That was 1979. About time it happens. After 44 years for me, thats one reason, on the two lanes across GRIC, its scary as hell to be in either lane. Trucks going 60, Phoenix males, driving contractor trucks like Ferraris, going 90, and thinking you’re holding them up, like Miss Busy Body here. Three lanes NOW would solve her immediate problem. In other areas, the slow lane is all busted up and the fast lane has fewer pot holes. Thats one reason I stay in the fast lane on some routes, tire salvation, and I dont apologize for it. We saw a huge rash of tire shreding on I-40 and 60/93 to Vegas. So poor little Teresa, get your priorities straight. If I’m going 80 in the fast lane and you feel we’re holding you up. Tough!

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