My favorite door

by David Safier

I walked my general neighborhood this morning. Lots of nice people. Lots of friendly conversations. Great walking weather.

But my favorite door was the most unpleasant. The guy was such a caricature, it was like he came from central casting.

I walk up his driveway. He's over 80, standing on the porch at the top of 8 steps. I smile, wave, say "Good morning."

Him: What are you selling?

Me: I'm not selling anything. I'm reminding people to vote on Tuesday.

Him: [Didn't hear me] What are you selling?

Me: [Still smiling, waiting to climb the steps before I respond] I'm not selling anything. I'm reminding people to vote Tuesday.

Him: Oh, I'm voting all right. [Gestures at my handouts]. What've you got?

Me: [Pulling out a flier for Nancy Young Wright] Well, there's . . .

Him: Are they Democrats?

Me: Yes they are.

Him: You're in the wrong neighborhood, buddy. [Gestures] You belong down south. [meaning central Tucson] [And he's wrong. Half of his immediate neighbors are Dems or progressive-leaning Independents].

Me: [Shrugging, still smiling] Clearly, we don't agree. I'm just doing my patriotic chore.

Him: You're no patriot. You're a socialist! [I begin heading down the steps] We're individuals here!

Me: [Chuckling, genuinely amused] Well, have a nice day.

Him: You have a lousy day. You deserve it!

7 responses to “My favorite door

  1. God, I’m tempted to go back go his house, knock on his door and show him your post. “Look, you just managed to give a Democratic candidate more money!”

    On second thought, Nah.

  2. You beat me by 10 minutes, Azazello. I’m just getting ready to post about the article.

  3. I think he comes from the “It’s not socialism if the money is coming my way” school of thought.

  4. 80 years old? Time is on our side…

  5. movingazforward

    Sorry to hear about this, David. I hope the rest of your contacts were much more pleasant. I love GOTV walking; never a dull moment (always a good challenge) plus great people to meet.

    I just made a donation to BfAZ on behalf of Mr. Nastypants. 🙂

  6. By “down south” I presume he means my neighborhood. Can you say demographic inevitability ? Here’s something for your Charter School file → http://bit.ly/SI5GMP

  7. Let’s see: over 80 years old means he is on social security and Medicare, maybe even a dual eligible for Medicaid, and likely VA benefits for military service. Somebody loves him some sweet “soclalism” and is too blinded by his hatred to acknowledge it.